I married up, and I like to say I married up. Wayne is the greatest. I mean I really like him and all that stuff, but he regularly reveals more to me about who God is than any person ever. I think that is probably pretty amazing since I live with him and know him best. He has always been that way, but the past two or three years it has been supersized revelation. Wayne is an example of Love, and since God IS Love, Wayne is constantly revealing God and his nature in our home. This is one thing that really got my attention this week.
I woke up Monday morning just basically depressed. The house looked like it had three tornadoes that spent the weekend with us, because well, we have three tornadoes that plan to live here for apparently the rest of their lives. I wanted to play with the boys and do things I wanted to do, but I felt like it would be responsible to clean. I was really grumpy. I felt guilty because I was depressed over something as dumb as a messy house. It was just an all around stupid cycle. I also feel terrible because Wayne worked on Monday, and I feel like it's nice of me if I don't lay around all day. I feel like I should keep the house picked up and cook food and stuff like that. Most day, I like doing that. That was not the case on Monday. I felt like if I had to pick up the same mess that I have picked up ten thousand times the week before, I would explode. I did things. I fed the boys and some other maintenance chores, but then I decided I was going to forget being responsible and take a nap.
It was amazing. God gave me some dreams that were very wonderful packed full of revelation. I felt empowered when I woke up, and I wasn't grumpy anymore either. But the house didn't get cleaned up all the way. Wayne came home, and at some point in the evening I brought up the status of the house. Wayne just sort of calmly, like it was no big deal said, "Audrey, If you want to clean the house, clean it. And if you don't want to, then don't." and that was that. He totally took away my pressure. Being pressure free made me WANT to get the house clean.
Wednesday, I was home again. We really needed to pick up the house AGAIN. Company was coming the next day, but I chose to take the boys to story time at the library and then had a nice visit with Nana. By the time we got back home, we only had maybe two hours before Wayne got home and it would be time to cook supper. The boys and I EFFORTLESSLY got everything picked up. Cleaning turned into quality time and it was fun. I don't want to live in a mess, but I realized that living in peace with some mess is better than clean pressure.
So our house may not be the best kept house, but just come over anyway. We'll make you feel good about yourself.
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