Separation of Church and State

Separation of church and state....what a concept! What a privilege to live in the land of the free!

Only one week until we gather at the voting booths, and I can hardly wait! I have always had a special interest in politics and government. I have VERY strong affiliations, and I CANNOT WAIT to exercise my right to vote next Tuesday. Probably 90% of the voters I know will cast the ballot the same way I do, but that is not good enough for me. Something bigger than the next elected haunts my thoughts on this Halloween Eve. I smell danger.

In the beginning, our nation's fathers laid the foundation of our great country implementing separation of Church and State. It's great to have government out of church business, but I believe the bigger revelation is the importance of keeping the church out of the government. Don't misunderstand me please.  I just know that God is more concerned with freedom than right and wrong.

Unfortunately the church has indulged in the tree of the knowledge of good and evil except we call it, “being right.” There is life here we are missing. Some are inappropriately using the pulpit to promote a political agenda “in the name of God.” Ummm...There is a big difference between being led by the Spirit and being led by the pulpit. Even if the pulpit is Spirit led and traveling the same river you are, no man is EVER to take the place of the inner voice inside you. Putting any man between us and God denies God of the oneness and relationship that he paid such a great price for.

Some of my most favorite people in the world have ministry titles, and if I'm honest I have to admit I am one too.   I'm for ALL people getting into politics. What I am opposed to are preachers manipulating people in the name of God from their pulpit to vote the “right” way.   I personally cannot listen to someone who trades their Sunday opportunity to share life for a political platform. It's dangerous! It's death! It's a return to bondage! 

We place people in authority and allow them to make decisions for us, speak into our lives, and tell us what to think instead of listening to that voice within us who teaches us and guides us into all Truth. Are ministers or political figures really any different than we are? Do we really put a man above us because of a title? The same God who loves them, loves us. If God himself became a man and made us coheirs with Him, why would we think it is right to place a man above us to the point we grow numb to his witness in our heart?

At the beginning of this year when the candidates blazed the campaign trail, I decided that this election year I would listen past their words and hear what they were really saying. Oh. My. Goodness. What I “heard” literally changed my life. God showed me what it means to listen with the ears of my heart. It is the same reason why Jesus heard what Simon was THINKING as the lady washed him with her alabaster and tears. I realized I had been trained to use fleshly ears to operate in this world, when really it's the senses of our heart that are the most sensitive. When you know something from the Spirit, there is no doubting. I don't need a man telling me what to think. I have ears to hear. And because I know that, I also don't feel like I have to help you think either. We all have the same God. Even if someone makes a mistake, is the freedom to err not more important than the right choice? After all, we are only free when we are free to fail.

It is a dangerous, DANGEROUS thing to allow a man to tell us what to think and how to act. It is the most seductive of temptations that inevitably has us marching around like brainwashed little puppets.   It is this way of thinking that allows the 10% to control the 90. Handing over our responsibility to another man to “hear” for us makes us question and doubt ourselves. When we doubt ourselves, we are easier to control. We become dependent on a man-made system instead of living in the Kingdom of God. We behave like we are told to behave. Say what we are told to say. Vote like we are told to vote. It makes us apathetic. It is a breeding ground for wicked rule-benders to rise and lead. We stick our heads in the sand as the few squeaky wheels take control of the masses.

Our nation was founded by a cool group of free-thinking radicals who dared to question authority and perceive that all men are created equally. Generations later we are drowning in a lake of apathy because we have been trained to let others think for us. I firmly believe more trouble comes for our nation because we the people have been desensitized by our dependency on a man to think for us and less with the political party in power. When people have confidence in their inner voice, no man, no nation, no world can rule him. We rule ourselves...A DEMOCRACY. Separation of church and state was put in place because our forefathers had a revelation of freedom...freedom in every sense...Freedom in church and Freedom in State.  TRUE FREEDOM! Ministers who use the pulpit as a political forum rather than simply sharing the love that is shed abroad in their hearts is misusing their calling/career. Bringing State matters into the church even for the “right” leads to the death of the very freedoms our nations was founded on and preached about. 

I have good news for ministers!!! Ministers are not responsible for the outcome of this election. We are not even responsible for people. Leave all that stuff up to God. We can trust Him and love them.  Encourage your listeners to listen to their inner voice. Be responsible for your message of life....not the message of right verses wrong, a.k.a the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If it was up to God we would not even know what that tastes like. Free people in church to keep our nation full of free people. A people confident in their inner man will become the strong voice in our nation, and God's kingdom will be established on the earth. It's time to regain our freedom. God's kingdom is opposite of man's kingdom. He is establishing HIS government....one that is governed by relationship and love. Yes, he really is THAT good!

I am conservative times a billion, but I didn't go eat at Chick Fillet ON PURPOSE. Why? Because my heart grieved for the people who claim homosexulaity as their identity and who Christians declare guilty. Congratulations to us church! We just built a bigger divide between God and some real people whom he loves. No wonder the world sees us like judgmental ass holes. We took a big stand against someone's behavior. Wow. We placed our “rightness” above something so clearly “wrong.” Do we really think taking a big stand at their behavior is going to change them? Do we really think our BEHAVIOR was anything more? I believe Jesus would have been hanging with the other side not to fix them, but because he loves them.  Please don't miss understand me. Maybe you ate at Chic Fillet on August 1^st just because you had a hankering for a chicken sandwich and some of those plaid potatoes. I didn't go because I didn't want to. To me a better stand would have been to proclaim the innocence of the homosexuals and buy their lunch. I didn't need a committee telling me to go or not to go. I didn't have to call up people I “submit to” to ask if I should or shouldn't go. Rejection never has or ever will introduce anyone to Jesus. The Kingdom of God is not governed like we think. Jesus made friends with the biggest sinner and traitor in town. He royally angered the people who “loved” him by being kind to someone who offended them. But when Zaccheus felt accepted and loved by Love himself, he didn't need a committee or a pulpit telling him how to behave. He woke up to Truth and said, “Whatever I have taken I will pay back four fold.” ...I'm glad Jesus didn't take a stand for what everybody else thought was “right.” He stood up for the person. That is the God I know. That is the government of the Kingdom.

November 6^th is just seven exciting sleeps away. Let's all go out and vote. What matters more than who we vote for is that we vote because we are lead from the inside out. ...Vote your instincts. We the people can do this without a man telling us what to think. This is the only way for liberty and justice for all.

Five Years With Jack

Today my Jack turns five-year-old. FIVE YEARS OLD!  In honor of my amazing five-year-old gift, I've decided to share about receiving him.   I think if I could ever write a book, a good title would be “Mothering Jack.” I just have a lot to say about being the mom to such a guy.   

Jack is such an adventure. He is the most awesomely unique, little guy in the whole wide world. It's always been “different” with Jack. I knew I was pregnant with Jack before it could even be confirmed by a doctor, and I knew he was special. Each one of our boys are special in their own right, but I often refer to Jack as our “especially special.” ...and also "Special Spectacular."

 Even in the womb, I felt like Jack would be rich and famous. When he was born we nicknamed him, “New Money.” Since his birth, I've felt like we are raising him for the world. I would hold that new born baby and ask him, “Who are you, Jack? Tell us who you are?” He just felt different. We could always tell he was cut from a different cloth. 

 

I often think of groups of people as having a flavor. Institutions to me have a scent. These “aromas” are created in my mind because people are like ingredients to a recipe that when formed together seem to taste a little differently. Jack definitely adds spice to the Blaylock Family. When he is gone, it is almost boring. (...I said, ALMOST. Anyone with boys knows that no matter what, “Boring” absolutely cannot be used to describe a household with three of them.)

Jack thinks about snow cream in July. His desire for it makes you even excited for winter. Jack really knows what he wants. It makes it a pleasure to buy him, “Underwear with sleeves” (boxers.) Jack is very intelligent. His verbal skills were amazing at 16- months. He was walking well at ten-months. 

Jack didn't really need potty-training. He just woke up one day and decided he didn't want to wear diapers any more. He's always had a remarkable understanding of numbers and money. At age four, he completed a K-1 workbook in less than three weeks without prompting from us. 

 His memory is like a steel trap. He brings up things that happened when he was 1-year-old. He remembers every food he has ever eaten, where he ate it, and who he ate it with. This is not an exaggeration. Flavors are important to Jack. He nods if his food is good. He dances if his food is exceptional. 

 

Jack notices things others just ignore. He ponders and understands things about life that is unusual for his age. He doesn't need to grow up and have babies because he already has Ben.  His vocabulary is still trying to catch up with his thoughts. He asked me last night, "Is our house breaking? Will we ever live in a different house? Well, even if our house gets really, really, really old, I just want us to always live in it."   

When you say something, Jack really listens, and can bring it up long after you forgot about it.  People who really know Jack, love Jack. When he sets his mind to something, it is as good as done. His imagination could rival a 50-year-old poet. His eyes! Even his little belly button is perfect. 

He is super hilarious. To watch him play is the best. He sincerely loves his momma. If you ask him if he is a Momma's boy or a daddy's boy, he grins really big and points to us both. He can be the sweetest, most kind, melt-your-heart, little snuggler ever. 

And sometimes I just don't know how to handle him. 
 

Even Jack's infant cry grated on me like fingernails on a chalkboard. If you don't give a good enough reason why he can't, he is going to do it anyway. “Four season in one day” is not enough moods. He can be sneaky. He is NOT a people person. He checks to see who is in charge A LOT.  Little things are turned into big deals. It shouldn't matter that the straw is yellow, but it does. And then he calls you with that sweet little voice just to make sure you are going to tuck him in at bedtime. He's edible. 

 

Even before he was born, I was worried about our “middle child.” After he was born the worry grew worse.  Then one day out of nowhere, I heard the Lord pretty much yell in my heart, “You won't treat him differently because he's the middle child. You'll treat him differently because he is different.” “Hmmm,” I thought. I wasn't even thinking about that. Then later the very same day out of nowhere again, I heard him repeat it. “You won't treat him differently because he's the middle child. You'll treat him differently because he is different.” “Um, Yes Sir. I hear you.” 

I heard him loud and clear, and that is when I began to listen....really listen.

This kid is different and the Lord said so, and it is okay that not all things are created equal at the Blaylocks. Jack couldn't even roll over yet, and already I was being prepared, trained, and equipped, to be the mother of this amazing little creature and his brothers I'm honored to get to love.

Then years pass, and I literally don't know what to do with this kid. I am at my wits end. Two toddlers and another one coming. Jack cries and I don't even think HE knows why. I cry too. I call Wayne at work. I pray. “Oh Lord! Teach me to love this child like you do.”

...the sun sets and rises again the next day and the next. I even forgot about my little prayer. Life goes on. It was just another typical day at home. Then I walk in the room where little Jack is standing. I pick him up just out of habit...obligation even. Then WHAM! BAM! HOLY (I don't have the words) GOODNESS! The creator of this child dropped a God-load of love into me and I looked at that kid and couldn't help but say, “I don't care if you are my child or not. I LOVE YOU!!!” 

Later when I told this story, I realized I was standing in the exact same spot where I had been standing the first time I heard the Lord say, “You won't treat this child differently because he's the middle....”

We surely do not have parenting down, but we have learned some pretty big lessons from a little baby Jack I would love to share with any parent of a God-given, strong-willed child.  

• If it is gray, it is black, and he needs to get in trouble. 
   
• Jack feels more safe and secure when you show him who is in charge. He actually rewards us for what we call “boot camp.” He has even thanked us for this.  It's always boot camp. 
   
• The behavior is his way of communicating what he hasn't quite learned to put into words. Listen past the noises to hear what his heart is crying about. Sometimes it is attention that can be easily fixed with asking him, “Do you want me to help you do some homework?” Sometimes he needs you to rock him to sleep. Sometimes he just needs to be allowed to kick it out alone in the bed. Sometimes he needs to help you cook something yummy.   Sometimes he needs his daddy to take him for a drive. Sometimes he needs a bath. Sometimes he needs a spanking. 
   
•  “Correction” might take some creativity. This is one of my favorites: Sometimes if we were holding on to Jack, he might jerk away from us when we say he could go.    I couldn't stand that!  I don't know how to explain it, but I felt like he wasn't at rest on the inside. He might even be in a good mood, but like I said, “if it is gray, it is black.” So if he jerked away, he would have to stand there still as I held him counted to 20 seconds or so. If he even twitched, I would start counting all over. The first time took about 10 minutes. (Checking to see who is in charge.) The second time took about 60 seconds. Now it just takes about 10 seconds, and is hardly ever needed at all. 
  
  
• Just because sometimes it doesn't look or act like us, doesn't mean it needs fixing. 
   
• A determined little guy will take a beating before giving in. (Remember determination is not bad.) Don't get mad. Sometimes spanking is not the way to handle it. Just give them time to think about what you want them to do and the consequences for not. Leave. Breathe. Then go back after the emotions have subsided and try it again. Sometimes all it takes to get compliance is just a little moment for them to think about it. 
   
• Our job as parents is to love him. Period. And in an atmosphere of love they will flourish. Parenting should feel as fun as being and aunt or an uncle. You know what I mean... Unconditional love without feeling responsible for how they turn out. They'll turn out. And who says “turning out” looks a certain way. Unconditional love is not trying to squeeze an individual into a mold created by someone else. 
   
• Being determined is gift of the Lord. Don't make the mistake to think determination is defiance. But if it is defiance, handle it. 
   
• Passiveness is not acceptable when parenting someone who feels loved when there are boundaries. 
   
• Say a lot, “You are not the boss of him. You are only the boss of You.” 
   
• There is no need to make a child share every single thing. It is perfectly fine for some things to be theirs and only theirs even if they are not using it at that moment. Especially early on, things were important to Jack. There were about five household objects determined by Jack that we allowed to be only his. It was remarkable. When he knew we would also fight for his favorite things, he shared everything else without hesitation. And soon, he didn't “need” those things anymore. He decided on his own that he would share “His” things. And that was a big day.
  
  
  
  
• God is the one responsible for our children. (Think about that....it's really difficult when you live in this world where it seems right to control your kids.)....it is NEVER okay to control. Love does have boundaries, however. I am not responsible for him. He's a gift to us because we get to be the first ones to love him. Call me irresponsible, and I'll take it as a compliment. 
  
  
   
• Rubbing Jack's back ALWAYS quiets the storm. Actually, this is how is goes: I have to remind myself that I am the parent and separate myself from the emotions of wanting to spank his rear end for crying because it is bedtime. I begin to rub his back (“Soft” his back is what my sister always called it.) Then in a soft tone right in his ear so he has to quiet down to hear I say, “Jack I will rub your back, but I'm not going to continue if you continue to throw a fit. I will give you 10 more seconds to cry, but if the crying continues after that, I will stop.” Works. Every. Time. (Except after the 10 seconds is up, there is always one or maybe two little whimpers. Then quiet. Peace. And usually sleep.) 
  

  
  

  • Sleep is VERY important.  Do not underestimate the power of sleep.
     
• Let “growing” be his timing. Trying to force anything will never work. He'll come around. He always does. Putting pressure on him to be a certain way against his will borderlines on manipulation. Don't do this to a determined little fellow...or anyone else for that matter.
   
• The more attention you pay to the problem, the longer it takes to get to the solution. 
   
• No matter if a child turns out to be George Washington, a teacher, a chef, a dishwasher, Tom Hanks, Robert Frost, Billy Graham, Peyton Manning, Eminem, or Hitler, who they are is NOT a reflection of you or your parenting style. God's first born Adam messed up too. He also had Jesus. I do believe whole heartedly that we cannot love our children perfectly when we think they are connected somehow with our identity. “Lord, Help me fully get this.” 
   
•  To think he needs teaching is a failure to learn from him.

  Every day, week, month, and year our little Jack astounds us with even more joy. He is an amazing little teacher. He continues to prove that his timing is the perfect timing simply because it is birthed out of who he is and not who we think he should be. He might not be a cookie cutter kid.....and that means he's perfect. 

He continues to answer our question, “Who are you, Jack?” and he shows us his answer, “unexplored awesomeness.” 

Looking forward to the adventure year five will bring us.  Happy Birthday to my especially special spectacular. 

 

 

Funny Friends

I love people who love to laugh. I've learned through my friend Bronda that in God's kingdom, prosperity is being rich in relationships. That is amazing to me, and I love that!

I have a friend who makes me feel very rich. She is the kind of friend that I can count on laughing with no matter what. Everything is funny to her. I blacked out laughing once.  I couldn't see and I didn't know where I was for a few seconds.  I was glad I had pulled off the road to finish our conversation.  

Laughing is a snowball effect with us. Something might win a little giggle, then the other laughs and at the one laughing and so on and so forth until we are hysterically laughing about something hardly funny at all. She is the kind of friend that I cannot eat or drink anything when she talks for fear of choking or spewing. She forgets things she says, so when I use them on her months later, she thinks I'm really funny. During one recent conversations, she told me a story that I can hardly think about without laughing. It is horrible, but I found it hilarious. 

"Natasha" told me this story about her sister, “Thelma.” Thelma married a military guy and was far away from her family when she gave birth to their child. It was a teaching hospital, so when she began to push, there was a room full of people standing at the foot of the bed observing. All were wearing blue scrubs except one man who was in regular clothes, holding a broom, and eating a hamburger. She thinks he was the janitor. Later when Thelma was walking the halls after the delivery, things felt a little too familiar when the janitor stopped caring for the floors to have a little chat with her.

The Vampire Slayer

I'm not a big fan of vampires, and I do NOT love vampire movies. But I've been thinking of them for a few months now, and have learned a lot about living from their illustration of death. With Halloween just around the corner, they seem to be everywhere except the Christmas aisles. I have even seen them in the sugar cookie section at the grocery store! With all the vampire advertising, it feels like the right time to finally share what I've learned about being a vampire slayer.  

The dictionary defines vampires as an unnatural being commonly believed to be a reanimated corpse that sucks the blood of innocent people, disturbs the living, and preys ruthlessly upon others. As I understand legend, a innocent victim becomes a vampire by being bitten by a vampire.

As the old saying goes, “hurting people hurt people.” We could easily equate people who are hurting to “Vampires.” Vampires prey on the innocent. It is who they have become, but it is not their true nature. They are an “unnatural being.” Once, they too lived in innocence until they were bitten. It wasn't their fault they were bitten. The bite was just too much. Their focus on the bite allowed venom to take over their life.  Now they are behaving in a way that is contrary to their nature, and they hurt people. From their bondage to death, they attack someone who is living. Some bites sink a little more deeply than others, but even the little ones can kill you. I once read a story about someone who used baby copperheads as fishing bait. The tiny bites didn't really hurt, but even the multiple tiny bites killed him.

It is terrible to be bitten. We were never created to be hurt. Do you know what is more terrible than the bite of a vampire? Becoming one. Focusing on the bite allows the venom to creep over you, control your life, and turn you into something you never meant to be.

I never want to be the person that brings hurt to someone else. I don't want to forsake God's reality for me by believing a lie about a vampire bite. I never want to be in bondage to darkness and live in death. Being a vampire is not who I am.   I can't fight the venom of a bite on my own, but I can keep my eyes on the prize, and the truth that already lives within me.   Life, not death, flows through my veins. There is an antidote for the death that tries to attack.

Forgiving is choosing to take the antidote. It often sounds like you are dismissing the vampire for their actions, but it is the only cure from the bite. Forgiveness doesn't make what they did okay. Forgiveness doesn't justify someone from behaving unnaturally. Forgiveness doesn't let them off the hook. Forgiveness is a force of life that drives out vampire toxins and heals the bite. Forgiveness will slay the vampire. Forgiveness releases you from the bite to the place just as if the bite never happened. This is innocence and peace.

The vampire is just a victim to a fallen system of hurt. Death, pain, bitterness, and anger fill their veins.  I'm sorry they were bitten, but that doesn't mean I have to hang out with them either. Just because we choose to walk in love, does NOT mean we allow mean people to walk over us. Walking in love means loving ourselves first. (Please don't misunderstand me.) We are taught all our lives to put others first. The airline is a perfect example of this. Before take off, passengers are trained in case of an emergency to put the oxygen masks on first before putting them on someone else. Why? Because if we are incapacitated, there is no way we can help someone else. If we don't value ourselves, there is no way we can value others the way God does.  When we see the value God has for us, we will value ourselves. And when we value ourselves, we will value others. We cannot love other people properly without first loving ourselves. The LOVELY nature of God flows effortlessly through our veins, so we are kind to people, patient with people, giving, faithful, FORGIVING, etc. etc. etc. It is HIS blood as our life-source now. Woo Hoo! LIFE flows here!

I've learned some things, and I'm not afraid anymore to take up for myself. For many years I believed letting people get away with “biting” was the right thing to do. (I'm laughing at the craziness of that!) There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death. It also doesn't mean that I go looking for conflict. (After all, I am not a vampire. PEACE is MY nature.) There are easy and effortless ways to slay vampires. Love, kindness, and blessings ALWAYS shine light into their darkness. Getting mad and fighting with them only pulls you down to their level. "Be mindful of the dark side."  Stay on the high ground. None of their weapons can be used against you when you are armed with a higher way of thinking. You live in a grace bubble. Know that! This battle is only in our minds. It is not reality. We make the bite real when we believe more in the bite than in the blood that abides within us. LIFE is worth forgiving.

People I Like

I like people who are so comfortable in their own skin that they make everyone around them feel the same. They are the life of the party, but you wouldn't know it because they make the person they are talking with feel they are the most important person in the room. I know three people who are consistently this way. All are successful and well-liked.

I like people who buy school supplies even if there are no students in their home. 

I like people who are kind to elderly people even if they think no one is watching.

I like people who love classic movies.

I like people who carry bubble gum in their purse just in case they get to interact with a child that day.

I like people who rescue animals and take them in as their own. (However I am not one of those people. I prefer human strays.)

I like families who color eggs and hunt them.

I like people who walk the higher way of thinking effortlessly. You can tell who these people are because they never and I mean NEVER engage in negative talk about any person. They address issues by minimizing the problem and focusing on the solution in a way that seems there was never even a problem at all.

I like the traffic lady who looks like her traffic gestures are choreographed. People literally pull over to watch her.

I like men who open the door for their wives.

I like people who take lots of pictures.

I like kind policemen.

I like people whose kids know the words to songs on the radio when they were teenagers.

I'm sorry. I can't help it. I love Gator from Kicks Country. I'm not even a country fan, but it is worth it for me to suffer through the songs to giggle at what he has to say on my long morning commutes. I like people who find the jobs they were made for, love their work, and excel in what they love.

I like single people who cook a full meal for just one person.

I like people who value people above a doctrine. 

I like people who find their calling.  You can tell when someone does because they would do it for free and never seem to complain about it. They stand out in their field and their passion for their work is inspiring. I once met a hotel maid who inspired me. She loved her job and took so much pride in her work. She was content and happy. Sadly, I really don't know many people like this.

I like the video store guy who did a little flip with the DVD before handing the rental  over to each customer in front of me.

I like people who give homemade gifts.

I like Mario the little El Tap waiter who ran every where, never spoke a lick of English, and still remembers us even though he doesn't work at the one we frequent.

I like people who have fifty-year-old toys in their house from when their children were little.

I like people who have a heart of a teacher. After a brief conversation with them, you know you have learned something. I still feel like an expert on the Big South Fork after a two minute conversation with a Park Ranger. I also know a lot about the post office.

I like people who will give a baby to an adoptive family so the child can have a better life. And I like people who desire to adopt them.

I like the seventy-year-old lady I once saw on T.V. who stepped in front of a car to protect the children crossing the road.

I like people who have a hobby and share it with confidence, but I also like people who do it just for themselves. (Although I must admit I crave to read that giant trunk of poetry you hide in your closet.)

I like people who still keep a record player.

I like people who like to feed people.

I like people who have clean closets.

I like people who are not phased by the opinions of others because they are so focused on their predetermined goal. I happen to live with one such little man.

And I like people who consider the feelings of others to the point they are willing to lay their own aside to ensure the happiness of others. (Which happens to describe the other three men in my home.)

I like people who keep journals.

I like people who probably have a stale French fry under a car seat.

I like the teenage, drive-through order taker at Taco Bell who makes taking orders more of a conversation than placing an order.   I actually sent corporate Taco Bell a little letter about her.

I like teenage moms who are still good teenage moms despite the opposition surrounding their circumstances.

I like people who have personalized license plates.

I like people who desire peace and are not afraid of confrontation to obtain it. 

I like people who take pictures of sunsets and post them on facebook.

I like ladies who wear big, bright, bold, and beautiful bling that matches their personality.

I like people who draw pictures on napkins.

I like people who teach their children to serve people who are different.

I like dads who value their families and make hard decisions seem easy when it comes to the family well-being.

I like people who play hide-n-seek.

I like funny people.

 I love people who laugh.